predicted story

since the whole wide world already heard the news about my resignation, i can safely say it here on my blog. I FRIGGIN RESIGNED! i dont have that many readers but its always best to be cautious yes?

so i was looking through my own personal stuff to clear before i leave next week. and i found this piece of self drawn cartoon. drawn sometime in August 2011, i never knew i predicted something true. LOL.

i laughed at this. really.

click to enlarge. joke of the day. :) well, if you understood it of course.

The Thanksgiving Day

its not the 4th of july but that should not limit us to be thankful on just ONE particular day only.

my family, none like others, different and unique. i am thankful that i have their support in everything that i do. its not a perfect family, but it is to me. trials may come, but we always persist as a unit, as one. with strong bonds, seas are sailed through in every kind of weather.

my friends, near and far. thank you for putting up with me, my blabberings and mutterings of nonsensical subjects. the laughter, the tears, the fights were all worth it. always there with arms wide open for hugs and sleeves for sniffs. i could never thank God enough for you to be understanding to my needs and being present when i need comfort. oh.... and blaming the world for everything along with me eventhough it was obvious i was the one wrong. it helps, even if you point it out so plainly to me after that.

to the ones who have hurt me, brought much tears to my eyes, pain in my heart, i am still thankful for you. without the hurt, i will never be who i am today, a stronger person. i pray for blessings to come upon you because i am thankful. no one ever deserves curses but blessings. i have let the pain go and forgiven, as i hope others would forgive me too.

to those i once loved but never did go quite far with, i am thankful to know that i at least was loved. we created happy moments together, times i would never regret happened. sad when we parted but i pray for you to find the right ones in life. and if ever our paths crosses again, i would shake your hand and renew the friendship without any grudges. you made me grow.

to those that hates me, well, thank you for having me in your thoughts. hah!

to the one above, i could never thank You enough for everything and anything. i thank You the most for all of the people i mentioned above. and for every little blessings you bring upon them and myself. You are awesome.

IF

yes i had to stumble upon this on 9gag but really, i was moved by this poem. it is exactly what i try to practice in life, if you must know. exactly it.

If

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream---and not make dreams your master;
If you can think---and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings---nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And---which is more---you'll be a Man, my son!

Rudyard Kipling

here we go again..

so, here we go again, down this yellow valley, where people erect signs of promises along this road. the further the distance, the surprises gets better. but who knows for sure, what awaits you?

so, pack your bags again, leave the rest behind along with the people you love. walk on alone and be greeted by strangers. some may pick your pockets, some may rob you. but its okay, its better than stealing what sits in your chest.

so long to the old, hello to the new. shake the dust off your boots, wash the dirt off your hands. look for another sunrise at the west and maybe a sunset at the east. you might just find the blue moon or the planet mars?

wipe those tears off your face, its not proper to greet in solemn expression. paint a fake smile on your sour face, its time for pretence one more. because really, what's real and what's not anymore?




(yes i am perfectly aware of where the sun rises and sets lol. did this in 3 minutes, utter randomness)

knock, knock

opportunity knocked at the right moment.

all i can say is, it was His timing and a great one too. a timely distraction from the past and dubious thoughts. i am prepared to give my all without having anything or anyone holding me back.

write..

writing.... such a comforting thing to do. it could be any kind of writing, out of emotions, about the day, my thoughts and so forth. still is comforting. i do this a lot. this random pressing of keys and be amazed (more like embarrassed) about the things that eventually appear on my screen.

is it weird that i like to type?

oh well, life must go on nevertheless. being weird or not.

i saw the doc last night. nervous about my body check up. results were, i have a foreign white speck somewhere in my body. lol. nothing to worry, the lady doc said. i sure hope she aint lying to make me feel better! in 2 months i gotta get back there to check if that its out of me or not.

i wont tell you what kind of medication or treatment i have to undergo. :S

blog more later.

literally Monday blues

a chapter in my book ended 2 days ago, abruptly and unexpectedly, and a sad one unfortunately. No one expected it except for the main character. Without a choice, i had to start a new one, beginning it in a confused state of mind. Such a familiar feeling, i could already predict how this one's gonna go along. Similar like the previous, except that i have no clue on the ending. Perhaps i should write a plot, dictate it so it follows. I will be satisfied but no happiness guaranteed. Secured future for sure, but no freedom.

Sigh. Life must go without besotting in these memories which will eventually drown me in a pool of dark waters. And i can only imagine that it was His wanting although i've prayed to let this one be a keeper. Unfortunately for me, it wasnt the same for him hence the ending. .

thankfully, there's this waiting for me to return and be indulged in with a smiling cow sitting at the top. :)

 well technically the cow aint smiling but it does seem like it. heh.

sad sappy stories aside, i dont like to seem too pathetic. call it ego or whatever. its back to work on a rainy Monday morning. Jams naturally occurred while the whole of KL whined and complained crawling to their offices. i enjoyed the ride for once, singing aloud to the songs played on the radio. a mixture of love songs, break up songs and some that doesnt seem to have any direction at all. 15 minutes late, but who cares. i took about an hour to pick out a few dresses from an online store for me to splurge on. pretty happy with my selections although i nearly choked to death when the final amount was displayed at the right hand corner of my screen. ok la, its actually just about a hundred bucks for 3 pieces. not too bad la.

that's it really.. :)  blog more soon.

atheist

recent news about the missing kid has now been found safe and now reunited with his family. word spread like wild fire over all social networks you can think of especially on twitter and facebook. a recent comment which i read from a friend's facebook news feed which angered me a little now brings me to today's post.

i dont know who he, the commenter, is personally but he certainly aint the first to comment such things publicly. in fact some of my friends do too, which is fine if it did not contain words meant to be offensive to other believers. yes of course from my title of this post, you would know i speak of atheists. his comment went something like why should we thank God for answering our prayers while other kidnap cases arent resolved which would mean unanswered prayers and it was out of luck for the boy's safe return, not of God's doing. i, as a strong christian believer, who knows there is a God and thankful for being raised this way, do not condemn those who do not believe the existence of God. it is after all our own rights to choose what to accept in life and what not to. but the rights of condemning others is what i see unacceptable.

yes not every atheist in the whole world has spit spiteful words to God-believers and I am thankful for you who dont. while i cant say us God-believers are total saints too, i cannot help to also see it unacceptable for us to condemn atheist.

we could share how great our religion is and why we chose it, with hopes it may inspire others to be curious to know more (in a plain manner, possible conversion) but never to belittle non-believers. that is only in my opinion. wouldnt it be greater if we all lived in a world in peace no matter how different our backgrounds are?

accept and learn to live with it. religion could well mean a way of life but if it makes a person better, why not huh....

and P/S, thank you Jesus for the boy's return. He must have had his reasons why He let it happen in the first place. You don't know for sure so stop making assumptions thinking it was God's doing for letting the kidnapping happen in the first place. I do not know the reasons either and therefore do not remark on the situation.

the resume

its been awhile since i looked at my own resume. such a habit for all of us to update it only once we begin to feel unhappy with our current jobs. I, on the other hand...... well.... i certainly aint unhappy but hey, we should not limit ourselves to other opportunities too right?

edited exactly 1 year and 8 months ago, it seemed quite hilarious to review my resume once again. the amount of misspellings, wrong structure of sentences and grammar, i could facepalm myself. its amazing how i've gained that eye-for-english-grammar after being put under a marketing department for just almost 2 years. the job itself really does require such an eye and well, its become a habit unfortunately. does annoy quite a lot of people too which includes my sister. *grins* sometimes i do it on purpose just so to annoy her. heh.

hey, if sisters arent mean to each other, it just shows they dont get along. so yes, its alright. she expects it.


:)


blog more later..

Anger

anger.. is such an extraordinary feeling. anger erupts, shakes, breaks, pulls, pushes us in ways we didnt imagine ourselves being able to achieve. if it is at all an achievement. it could sometimes be a form of motivation to work towards an unreachable goal just to prove ourselves in ways we need not. or paralyze, immobilizing our bodies to hold no ability in performing.

anger silences yet at the same time grows inside to change a person's character to be more audible. in some ways, the change may be permanent or sufficient enough to alert others on being cautious with their next set of words that comes forth from their lips. anger may make you unlikable or feared. in worst cases, hated.

for myself, i choose not to speak my thoughts, for i believe angry words are often the raw and rude truth. and sometimes, regretful expressions. some say it is a strength, others, a weakness. confusion often occurs in my tangled threads of thoughts and i am left wondering if i should hold my tongue or not. depending on situations, i try to decipher the pros and cons should i unchain these thoughts to convert them into angry audible sounds.

but oh........ for the goodness of the world, perhaps it is better to change our ways to avoid being upset or disappointed.

i do that. a lot. appreciation sometimes follows after, advantages taken too.. and then some gets annoyed for being puzzled trying to piece back my jigsaw puzzle of emotions. with so much practice, it has become a natural. that optimistic point of view in wrong thing that happens in the world.

sigh, damn you, anger..